A Shari and Bill text session.

Please do not read if you are sensitive to profanity!!!

(Dex-star and George are our cats, both of them love me, but only Dex-star loves Bill, George hates his guts and often spends the day staring at him snarling, and when Bill walks near him he Hisses and growls at him, oh and George Hi 5's me)

Shar: Good morning to the most gorgeous stinky face I know :D

Bill: And to you nice face/arse lady :)

Shar: Lol it's such a beautiful day today that the sun reminds me of you.... p.s Dex-star said get fucked.

Bill: Bahaha, its nice here too :) tell that c*!@ its fuckin on like donkey kong when i get home.

Shar: He said MOW. I think that means "bring it on" or it could possibly mean "uhh oh"

Bill: Tell him i love him till his hair falls out the little C$%@ grrr!

Shar: Lol, he replied "get fucked, im with shari in pushing you down the stairs". (how convenient I understood him then)

Bill: Tell him to bring his tough mate George, i'll fuck both those pussies up! :)

Shar: George wants no part he has his own plan to take you out, I liked his better so I gave him a high five. Once Dex-star found this out he wasn't happy so he told George and I to go fuck ourselves and he is now with you plotting a way to take George and I out.

Bill: HAHA, little does Dex know that after i incorporate his super vision into my plan and take out George, and you by association, i'll use his super vision to lock him away forever in the back room. BAHAHA!

Shar:  Dex-star says you can't have his super vision power, as you do not wish to be Allies with him he is back on our side and high fiving George too :D it is you little human who will be locked away in the back room dying a slow and painful death with nothing but a big box of litter to wee and poop in, and he also said Muhahahaha we will see how you like having to pull litter out of your arse hair.

Bill: Fuck that plotting little C@#$, i'll cut his nails back to little girly nails and paint them red and put a dress on him and make him sing ABBA songs for youtube :D

Shar: Dex-star said you will have to come up with something better then that as he has super vision power, it is so immense it makes him cross eyed. He will bring you down in 0.6 seconds flat, your only hope is to get George on your side with his super snarley smile, that has a take down rate of 0.4 seconds. Dear Mr Smiley you are one dead mofo as you can never be friends with with George, he hates you more than Shari hates peas..... Muhahahaha. P.s next time i poop when your home i will climb all over you without washing my paws ahahahaha

Then Bill called me at lunch and declared Dex-star, George and I the winners :D 

The End